As I was looking at these pictures, I was feeling insecure about them and not liking how I look. Goodness. :)
This one below was on my birthday yesterday. Carter has blonde hair!!! You can hardly tell normally because he doesn't have a lot of hair. But I guess the light hit it in such a way that you can tell it is blonde in these pictures. His Dad had blonde hair when he was younger.
Copco cup. I drink a lot of water. That's pretty much the only thing I drink. Maybe milk or juice or tea randomly but generally water is my beverage of choice. I usually carry around my Nalgene bottle around but decided to upgrade when I saw one of these:
reusuable cup.
Havaianas Flip Flops. I really like the little jewel in the center. They add just a bit of femininity. They are super comfortable.
Carter had his 6 month wellness appointment today. It was the usual business. He's doing good. One of his testicles still hasn't come down yet so we have to go to a urologist to figure out where it is. But other than that it was a quick appointment that ended with some shots.
No matter how much tough love you have, it breaks your heart to watch their reaction when getting shots. His little face scrunches up as tears start to pour out. This time he almost seemed angry. His face turned red and it was as if he was saying, "How could you let this happen?"
As I watched all of this take place, I was reminded of a small section from this book I have mentioned numerous times, "Wild Things: The Art of Nurturing Boys." The basic summary is that boys develop strength through struggle.
"Struggle builds great resilience in boys. Every young man I've invited to speak to my class has tasted significant struggle-whether it's abandonment, separation and divorce, the loss of a parent to death, a struggle with drugs and alcohol or pornography, rejection by peers, or bullying. As they speak, these young men give testimony to the anguish of those life experiences and the resilience they gained as a result of living (at times) in agony. They are living examples of the painful beauty of refinement and redemption-the kind of redemption we all long for our children to know and believe but are afraid for them to experience."
The author goes on later to explain that it is our job to teach a boy how to struggle well not keep them from struggling.. Teach them how to put words to their emotions. (Boys are bad at emotions...in general.)
After the nurse left and the torture ended, I held my little guy and talked to him as he seemed to settle down.
"Did that scare you?" "Did that hurt you?" "Sometimes we have to do things we don't want to do. And that's okay. You can tell your mother how that makes you feel." "Were you surprised?" "I'm sorry that made you sad."
I know he isn't computing any of this yet but I thought it was good practice in learning how to teach Carter how to deal with what he is feeling.
*********
I thought this was a great idea. No matter how well I think I am packed for an outing, I usually forget something. Babies require too much stuff. :)
This past Saturday I was one of the 300,000 women across this nation that came together in one of the 8hundredsomething churches that hosted Beth Moore's stimulcast "So Long Insecurity." I was able to go with my mother, grandmother, and sister.
There was lots of emotions and adrenaline that I encounter going to any sort of conference or camp or experience like this. It's just exciting to be apart of the body of Christ and join together with women to deal with a topic that is so prevalent. It's exciting to be apart of worship and realizing that we are all in this together and I am not alone. At many points of the day, I wanted to cry. Lots of emotion.
I feel like in many ways I am the poster child for this book. I deal with issues of perfectionism (which is insecurity in an art form), not knowing how to forgive, bitterness, selfishness, body issues (Is there a women in this culture that doesn't have body issues?).
A few points from my notes: *Insecurity is unbelief. Not believing God is who he says he is and not believing that I am who God says I am. *She used Ephesians 4:17-5:1 *Her talk was based off an acronym for the word SECURE. (Which I kind of rolled my eyes when she first said it but then she explained that Psalms and Proverbs are written similarly.) A secure women is..... S-Saved from herself. E-Entitled to truth. C-Clothed with intention. U-Upended by grace. R-Rebounded by love. E-Exceptional in life. *The goal in all of this is to put off the former self and put on the new self. This takes intention and passion. It's a mental decision, put into action, and then the hope is through practicing the mental decision will eventually make its way into our hearts. It just doesn't happen instantly. *I need to learn and remember hourly THAT I AM A DEARLY LOVED CHILD. And when we know we are loved, we can love. *Are others worth what it would take to walk in security of Christ? (I'm sure my husband and son would appreciate it. They are not responsible for my security and neither are our friends or other family members.)
There was much more and I cannot do justice to her teaching. It was passionate and real and just so honest. She emphasized that this wasn't just another topic that she decided to do. She had been uncovering this for herself this past year and a half and as she uncovered it more and more she could see insecurity everywhere she went.
God used what happened on Saturday to bring his gospel to his children. There's a great blog post by her daughter that wraps it up so eloquently.
I would encourage every female to read this book. If you think you don't have insecurity, you will realize you do. It's just about being honest about what really goes on inside of our minds everyday and being proactive at trying to gain the freedom that God promises us as his children.
My Dear Sister
If Christ is Your Savior
You are the dwelling place
Of His own Spirit
You have it IN YOU
to be secure.
Every day of your life
You have a choice to make
You can live in your old defeat
Or you can turn from your unbelief
And choose life
Make up your mind
To put off the old you
And put on the new you.
Never, ever, ever forget
That the Lord is your security.
He will keep your foot
From being caught in a trap.
He will take care of you
To your very last breath.
Now, leave this place
And go out into the world
And act like a person
Who knows she’s dearly loved.
You were born to be exceptional.
So, Girlfriend, go forth
And walk worthy of your calling.
You are clothed in strength and dignity!
Now unto Him
Who can keep you from falling
Be glory and majesty
Power and authority
Through Jesus Christ our Lord
Now and forever more
Amen.
So Long, Insecurity!
My mom has a few pictures that I will try to get and put up later. :)
I have really liked the art by John Golden for a boys room. Unfortunately I haven't taken the plunge b/c it's a little pricey. And I just can't justify buying it at this time in our lives. Not a priority in our budget.
So I was super excited when I came across this:
I like it b/c there is no specific theme, it's not to cutsy, lots of good colors, and I think it could last for quite awhile in his room before he is too old. Oh, and it's on sale. Bonus**!
pajama time.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
I put Carter's mobile up that we got in Ikea in Arizona. I was saddened b/c once again I was reminded that St. Louis doesn't have an Ikea. Extremely annoying.
Anyway Carter loves his mobile. It kept his attention for quite awhile and he seemed to really enjoy it.
I think I am going to make another one for over his crib.
While I wait for Carter's furniture to come in, I am slowly doing little things each day. For instance, yesterday I made some fun monogram art [see below]. And later that night I headed to the Goodwill where I found this cute little porcupine.
I have had thoughts of painting it white or brown or blue or orange or maybe just leaving it as it is. We'll see.
Turns out it was originally from Pier 1 and I snatched it for $2.00. I was excited. My idea is to keep it on one of the shelves so my little man won't be able to get it and then try to heave it across the room one day. It's heavy.
A little progress on Carter's nursery was made today. For starters, I cleared out his room of random boxes and storage items that need to go to our storage unit.
And I made some easy, fun art to go on these wall ledges I got at Target [on sale.]
It's so easy I shouldn't even give the steps but basically I just took orange, polka dot scrapbooking paper and printed a royal blue "C" on it in a western font, stuck it in a frame, and "wa-la." It's nothing that great but will hopefully be cute with everything else. Final cost= $0.
I feel like Carter is getting to the age where he needs a good room. His nursery has always been random, borrowed furniture. It has worked for us b/c we knew we would be moving and (might still move) and we didn't want to invest in furniture during all this transition time. But now that the little man is getting bigger and starting to play and notice things, I think we need to change up his room situation a little bit. Making it more interesting and fun for him. (Or maybe I just want to have fun??! Hmmmm.....)
So I had some store credit and found a good sale. And this is what we've got so far:
A fun, modern rocker.
This crib. Turns into a daybed and a toddler bed. Nice clean lines. Bonus: Storage underneath and non-toxic.
I'll keep you posted on the progress.
Other ideas:
Turn Casey's old car toys/baseball cards into wall art....somehow.
Where the Wild Things Are art (The book about boys I am reading "Wild Things: The Art of Nurturing Boys" mentions this book as it describes the boy mind and their imaginations.)
I had such good aspirations this morning of getting up and getting to work on the list of things I need to do. But instead I find myself a little off this Monday morning blogging. Shocker. I'm feeling a little groggy. I think I good walk/run after this will get be going. I have a fridge full of veggies that need to be dealt with and our apartment needs a cleaning.
Meanwhile my little man is taking his morning nap. There's really nothing more precious than a baby. Period.
Carter will be dedicated on May 8th. Last night we attended the class that is required before dedication. It was really good. They "casted vision" for baby dedication and made sure to clarify that from infant baptism. They also really emphasized the importance of Fathers. Such good stuff. Anyway....we are excited about baby dedication.
It's crazy that a yearish ago this was Carter.
And this is him now.
Gettin' a little ticked at mom.
DROOL.
More drool. Combined with milk. This is my life.
He LOVES his Daddy. They have fun together. Carter could laugh and laugh at his Dad all day long.
Everything goes in his mouth.
Grandpa Hillis and Uncle Dan (corner right)
CRAZY.
And there's people out there that don't believe in God. And people who can justify abortion. Evil. My heart hurts so much for the innocent.
But God is bigger.
Praise Him.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Friday, April 2, 2010
(Sorry all you faithful readers. Couple reasons for not blogging: a) I need to spend less time on the stupid computer. b) We've been busy. c) I didn't want to.) I'm just better with lists so here is a update for us: *the kid-He's adorable. Getting big. Laughing lots. Changing all the time. He loves his Daddy. It's sweet. He's just a good, easy baby. We love him. His favorite activities are his johnny jump up and his exersaucer. But mostly he just likes being with people. Don't we all?
*me-Love being able to stay at home. I am currently on a organization mission. I have purged tons of clothes and books and just stuff we do not need SO WHY HAVE IT?! I am also trying to learn how to coupon and how to save money. I go to consignment sales and shop craig's list. I am trying to learn to cook new things. That's fun. Sometimes disappointing but I am learning to enjoy the process and not be a perfectionist b/c that seems to get me no where. I am currently reading quite a few books. So Long Insecurity by Beth Moore is great. I feel I am getting wiser. Learning to understand my feelings and how my mind works. Learning to deal with emotions and people a little bit. I am learning to pray hard for my husband and kid. I am trying to exercise fairly regularly. It just feels good and starts my day off great. I find that the best time to do it is right after Carter's breakfast. I love my jogger stroller.
*Casey-LOVES his new job at Parktown Porsche. Working hard. Drives expensive cars everyday. It would appear that everyone likes him there. Pretty tired though. We are trying to learn to slow love down and not busy ourselves and fill up our calendars. He recently got his hunting license which he is excited about.
*Easter- We are looking forward to a good Easter. Last night Casey and I went (on a date!!! Thanks sis for babysitting!) to the Good Friday Experience at our church. It was so good. Their attention to detail and creativity in telling Easter story is excellent. We all learn differently and I love that they try to engage people in different ways. I hope I can learn to do that for my children. Saturday we will go to church and head to my mom and dad's after. Sunday we will hit up Casey's family. And hopefully rest and relax and remember in between. It's nice to be home for the holiday. Home sweet home!
